it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just cut my nipple shaving
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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