I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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