did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
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if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
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She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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