but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.