i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
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