the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
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Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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