Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.