She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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