This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
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