I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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