Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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