no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
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She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
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Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.