i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
