my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
only you would photoshop your dick
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
