I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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