Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
