On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
