so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
