dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
