Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
