The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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