She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
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Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
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He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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