why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
