yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
