One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
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