Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize