I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana