my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
If I die, sorry about rent.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
