the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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