So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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