Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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