Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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