Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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