what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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