Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
