This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize