3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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