For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
In other news, I just burned my penis
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
