oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
