Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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