nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize