I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize