Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
