She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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