Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Randomize
