She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize