hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
