ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize