You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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