***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.