In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
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Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
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My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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